The Ultimate Guide to Reduce Screen Time: CBT (part 1)
Here is how to put Cognitive Behavioral Theories into practice
Foreword
Nowadays, it seems like everything is trying to tug at your time and attention: social media, online streaming, video games, pornography… In this distracted world, those able to pull back, are going to be happier and more successful.
This is not an easy task, and people looking for ways to take back control of their digital habits, generally find two types of solutions:
Using dumber technology. These are mostly dumb-phones that do not allow you to access the internet. However, you miss out on actual useful features, like Google Maps, the Camera app…
Making technology dumber: These are mostly applications that block you from accessing addictive apps and websites at specific times of the day. However, these solutions only change your device behavior, and not your own. In fact, you might have caught yourself in the past continuously tapping “Remind me in 15 minutes” on the iOS Screen Limit…
Through my thesis research and my startup work, I realized that the key to a healthy phone usage is not dumbing down our devices, but raising our own self-regulation abilities. We overuse our phones because they act as an effortless escape from uncomfortable emotions. We might be bored, anxious, stressed, or really dreading to start that important project… and instead of coping with that emotion in a healthy way, we drown ourselves with TikTok videos to distract ourselves (feel free to swap TikTok videos with your own digital addiction).
During the past two years, I founded a startup dealing with social media addiction, read hundreds of research papers, conducted dozens of interviews with users, researchers and technologists, and performed a study with 93 participants of an intervention that significantly reduced social media addiction scores. From all my learnings, I have created an actionable guide which I am releasing in a series of posts.
The first issue on how to use cognitive behavioral theories to reduce screen time is available for free below.
The Ultimate Guide to Reduce Screen Time: CBT (part 1)
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the most effective forms of therapy. It has also been shown effective at reducing screen time and markers of social media overuse. The following is, to my knowledge, the most comprehensive resource on how to apply CBT-based theories to reduce excessive screen time, problematic internet usage, and social media addiction.
This guide is centered around a cognitive behavioral model from Stephen Briers that explains the five stages that lead to unhealthy usage. Think of it as a map. It doesn’t capture the full, complex reality of your experience, but it's a useful framework to navigate around this issue.
Here is a quick rundown of all the steps from the model, further down you will find a more detailed explanation and how to counter them.
Disclaimer: I am not a doctor nor a therapist. I am a digital product designer who did a MSc thesis project on building a product for social media addiction, and founded a startup about it. This is also the reason why this guide focuses mostly on social media overuse, but it can also be used for other forms of excessive screen time.
The model
It all starts with a trigger. Triggers can be categorized as external or internal.
External triggers are elements in your environment that prompt you to use social media. They might be a notification alerting you to a new message, seeing others around you engrossed in their devices, or even specific locations where you typically check your social media (e.g. the toilet).
Internal triggers, on the other hand, are the psychological or emotional states that drive you to use social media. These might include feelings of boredom, loneliness, stress, or the anxiety that arises when you're faced with a challenging task or decision.
Automatic thoughts and beliefs: Once a trigger is activated, it's often followed by automatic thoughts and beliefs. These are instant, unconscious reactions that form a mental pathway towards social media usage. For example, you might believe that scrolling through social media will help you relax after a hard day. Or, the thought "I might miss out on something important" might surface when you're trying to resist checking your social media.
Cravings: The automatic thoughts and beliefs create cravings, strong desires to use social media. They can manifest as restlessness, a preoccupation with thoughts of social media, or even physical sensations such as increased heart rate or jitteriness.
Permissive beliefs: These are the thoughts that 'give us permission' to act on our cravings. You might tell yourself, "I've worked hard today, I deserve a break," or "A few minutes of scrolling won't hurt." These permissive beliefs can effectively dismantle our resistance and lead us towards indulging the craving.
Maladaptive usage - Lapses and Relapses: A lapse is a one-time return to previous behavior (like spending more time on social media than intended), while a relapse is a full return to previous behaviors over an extended period. For most people, some lapses are inevitable. While these might feel like failures, it's important to view them as part of the learning process. They provide valuable information about our triggers and help us create more effective strategies for the future.
External triggers
External triggers are cues in our environment that can prompt us to use social media. These may include notifications from our apps, the proximity to our devices, or visual reminders such as seeing a friend scrolling through their feed. I am going to give you some examples of things you might do or have in your environment that increase external triggers. They are not necessarily things that you need to change, but they represent good examples of factors that might trigger you to use social media.
Seeing your phone next to you while working/going to bed
Hearing a notification sound
Seeing your phone as soon as you wake up because it is your alarm
Seeing others scrolling on social media
Being in a place where you habitually use your phone (e.g. toilet, public transpo...)
Seeing the icons on your home screen
The key to managing these external triggers lies in understanding their influence and taking active steps to control our environment. The beauty of external triggers is that many of them can be easily modified and are set-and-forget.
For example, you can change notification settings. Consider turning off non-essential notifications or setting specific 'quiet hours' during which notifications are silenced. iPhone has a notification summary setting which can be useful in batching all your notifications at specific times of the day. You can read about how I set up my phone here.
Another tactic involves creating designated device-free zones. You can establish areas in your home or workplace where your phone is not allowed, encouraging a physical disconnect from the digital world periodically. For example, you can avoid charging your phone in your bedroom, and use a physical alarm clock instead.
Ask yourself: when you use social media, where are you? What device are you using? Was it reachable with no effort? Do you need to keep that device there? Does it need to have access to social media?
Internal triggers
Internal triggers are typically more elusive. These are feelings and emotions that push us to reach for our phones and open a social media app. Internal triggers might include emotions such as anxiety, boredom, task aversion. Following these, social media is used as a way to avoid these uncomfortable feelings. It offers an escape, a distraction.
Other times, it’s emotions that lead us to use social media with a specific goal in mind: for example FOMO (Fear of Missing Out), loneliness with its needs for connection, or needs of validation.
Here’s a list of common internal triggers. Ask yourself: which are the most likely to lead to social media binges?
Boredom: Using social media as the default source of stimulation during any period of dullness
Anxiety: Turning to social media as a distraction from feelings of worry or unease.
Task aversion: Using social media to escape from unappealing tasks, leading to procrastination.
Fear of Missing Out (FOMO): Frequent social media checking to feel 'connected' and 'updated'
Loneliness: Using social media as a bridge to others when feeling isolated.
Need for Validation: Posting on social media and checking for 'likes' and comments for affirmation.
Stress: High levels of stress might lead individuals to use social media as a form of stress relief, a distraction from stressors, or a way to seek support.
Insomnia: Using social media as a time-passing activity during periods of sleeplessness.
Sadness or Depression: Turning to social media as a distraction or comfort during low moods.
Most people mistake excessive social media usage as a time management problem, but actually it is mostly an emotional management one. We often use social media as a coping mechanism for uncomfortable emotions.
To solve that, we need to